Just another letter.

intan nur hadilah

There’s an amazing thing about broken hearts. 
When you don’t get what you want, you discover a need.
When you discover a need, you begin to ask.
When a request is unfulfilled, you keep asking.

Sometimes He doesn’t give you what you ask for when He wants to give you something more.
Sometimes He doesn’t give you right away because He knows there’s something better. Or so you can keep asking. Because it is in the process of begging, the process of crying to Allah, that you are elevated and brought nearer.

It is in the process of asking that you are brought to the foot of His throne.
It is your need and helplessness that drove you to His throne. He deprives to give.

-  Yasmin Mogahed

Helplessness.

Mungkin mereka tak tahu atau tak perlu tahu.
Kadang-kadang aku penat. Letih. Bosan.
Kenapa perlu wujud masalah semua ni? Sampai bila nak selesai?
Tersepit di tengah-tengah.
Di sini berkata begini, di sana berkata begitu.
Ditelan mata mak, diluah mati bapak.
Takpe, masuk telinga kanan keluar telinga kiri.

"Bersangka baik, bersangka baik, bersangka baik." 
Benda yang aku selalu ingat kan hati -- setakat yang mampu.

Maintain.
Sebab aku selalu tahu, aku belajar banyak benda.
Nilai hidup yang Tuhan bagi sebagai ganti.
Yang cikgu atau lecturer kat sekolah tak boleh ajar.

Alhamdulillah even for the bad. As hard as it is to believe, it can be so much worse.

the third one.
" Because it is in the process of begging, the process of crying to Allah, that you are elevated and brought nearer."

Jangan berhenti berharap.
Tapi apa-apa pun,yang aku tahu dapat gaji bulan ni, 31st March aku NAK Baskin Robbin.
Okay tidur.

Imaginary family tree.

Hi. Nama penuh - Intan Nur Hadilah binti Purdiono.

Dulu masa sekolah sampai sekarang, mesti orang akan bertanya,

" Ayah awak Indonesian ke?"

Yes, he was. And so my mother.

They had migrated to Malaysia around 30 years ago. 

Way before they had me, and so my first brother.

I'm a traveler's daughter. Two married person migrated to another country that was a complete strange to them and decided to have a life here. Solo, no relatives neither other family members.

I grew up,

not knowing how does it feels to 'balik kampung' during holiday or Hari Raya.

not knowing how does it feels to call someone, 'Mak Long' or ' Pak Ngah'.

not knowing how does it feels to have a nenek that will cook whatever you are craving to eat.

But among the 'not knowing', I am so blessed with a brother, a sister, a mother and a dad ( I miss you ) indeed. Truly.

Life is beautiful in many ways depends on how you choose to see it.

And through out my life, there are countless wonderful people come into my life and be my partial family relatives. My partials aunts and uncles, and even cousins.

My mum had babysits these two girls since there were 2 months. 

They were one of my precious childhood memories.

Playing mak-mak, cikgu-cikgu, masak-masak and maybe yes, we did play kahwin-kahwin :p

Being the oldest, i remembered being the mak and these kids would be my lovely children.

Weh okay serius lawak bila fikir balik. Biasa lah zaman takde Angry Bird, Temple Run kan.

And at the age of 17 and 15, Tina and Adik still come over for sleep over.

They remind me pretty much of my sister and me.

Talking about each other friend's and we are each other fashion consultant.

" Adik, Nana nampak BOYAN tak pakai selipar ni?" haha. 

Time flies. These little girls are growing up and be a grown up ladies. 

Kalau dulu ajak main gi padang, sekarang ajak lepak Tutti Frutti lah kannnn. 

Kalau dulu ajar colour colour, sekarang ajar nak kira mass of Oxygen- Chemistry.

Padahal aku pun tak ingat mcm mana.

I thank Him for lending you people in my life. I love you sweethearts dearly. ♥

Be a person your parents would be proud of here and Life after, InsyaAllah.

Ohh and one more thing,

Nanti Kak Intan kahwin tolong jadi flower girl eh? 

Psych rotation #1

Personality disorders;
1. Cluster A-odd and eccentric
- paranoid
- schizoid
- schizotypal
2. Cluster B- dramatic, emotional and erratic
- antisocial
- histrionic
- borderline
- narcisstic
3. Cluster C -anxious and fearful
- OCD
- avoidant
- dependant

Tahu klasifikasi itu dahulu.
Cukup.

L i f e 🌟

intan nur hadilah

“Setiap orang,
Akan ada sesuatu yang dia simpan.
Akan ada sesetengah perkara yang dia sembunyikan.

Dan ada sesetengah perkara yang ingin dia kongsikan.

Siapa pun dia,
Segembira mana pun dia.
Walau sekerap mana kamu melihat dia tersenyum,
Pasti ada perkara-perkara yang pernah membuat dia terluka.


Pasti ada sesuatu yang pernah menguris hatinya,
Pasti ada sesuatu yang pernah membuat dia menangis.

Pasti ada.
Kerana dia juga manusia.

Makanya,
Bila kamu menyangka bahawa hanya kamu yang merasa,

Hanya kamu yang melalui,

Dan hanya kamu yang mengerti,

Kamu silap, dan kamu salah.

Ada orang lain yang pernah melaluinya,
Bahkan ada orang lain yang pernah merasakan lebih dari apa yang kamu rasakan.

Ada orang lain yang pernah melalui lebih teruk dari apa yang pernah kamu lalui.
Ada.

Cuma, mungkin kamu yang tak pernah tahu,
Kamu yang tak pernah nampak.
Jangan selalu menganggap,

Bahawa kamulah yang paling susah, 
paling sakit diuji,

Paling berat diduga.

Ada.

Ada insan lain, yang lebih besar ujiannya, yang lebih berat penderitaannya.
Sudahlah, kesat air matamu,


Walau serumit mana situasi kamu.
 Pujuk hatimu.
Yakinlah DIA ada, dan akan selalu ada.
Bila kamu menyandar harapan padaNYA, DIA tak akan sekali-sekali mempersia harapan kamu.


Bila kamu mempercayai segala takdir dan ketentuanNYA,
DIA tak akan sekali-sekali mengkhinati kepercayaan kamu.”

via tersenyum-melihat-langit. tumblr

2012, you had been a year filled with every emotions, every colours that exist in this universe.
And no matter what, I am very thankful for every single of it because i believe each up and down comes with wonderful blessing, indeed :)

Alhamdulillah.
2013, please be awesome too!
pleaseeee pleaseeee pweaseeee.
:)

of 21 and weddings.

Hidup ni akan lalui banyak fasa. Dari awak kanak-kanak sampai lah remaja, lepas tu dewasa.
Fasa pandai berjalan, fasa first day of school, first day of period, fasa first relationship, fasa hati berkecai dan macam-macam lagi.
And so, salah satu fasa significant dalam hidup aku dan Sarah Hani is bermula nya

FASA pergi wedding kawan sendiri.

Bila umur dah jejak 20-an, aku rasa fasa ni akan menjadi satu fasa normal.

Last few days, we had been to two wedding of our dear classmates of 5Alpha. 2 wedding in the same week.

Yazmir as the first ever wedding of ours and Faiqah being the second one.

Yazmir & Dinie

Apa yang menakjubkan sangat pasal phase ni smpai korang dua nak significant ni?  

Kalau dulu,

• ikut mak pergi wedding, just pergi untuk makan makan lepas tu habis makan, sibuk dah " Mamaaa, jom lah balikkkkkk". Lepas tu mama mesti macam, " Sabar lahhh nak jumpa kwn mama tu jap." 

•  Dulu aku tak faham kenapa mak cik-makcik yang datang wedding tu sibuk sangat nak tengok  bilik pengantin. Aku tak suka sebab nak kena bukak kasut lah bagai.

• Tak payah nak effort sangat untuk bersosial dengan orang lain, senyum senyum. Sorok belakang mama. Kalau mama introduce kawan dia, salam je lah, senyum. Okay dah

•  Takpayah nak sibuk fikir nak beli hadiah apa untuk wedding.

•  Just grab je any baju kurung ke apa yang sesuai lahh.

Faiqah &Afiq

Tapi sekarang wedding kawan sendiri,

Datang, makan. Time makan duduk dengan sarah, mata akan in the same time akan scan surrounding. In slow voice, " Weh kau nampak sesapa yang kita kenal lagi tak?" Hah part ni akan ada dua option, Kalau orang yang discan tu macam rasa nak tegur, aim lah lepas habis makan. Kalau rasa macam awkward, AVOID EYE CONTACT. Roger? haha

Haruslah bersosial. This is the good time to meet old friends yang dah lama gila tak jumpa. Update pasal life mereka dan anda. Taking pictures. 

And tanya soalan cliche, " Hah kau lahhh kan lepas ni." Reaction paling comel and common, soalan ni akan dijawab dengan gelak, denial and pass dekat kawan kau yang lain. Fasa soalan, " Berapa anak dah sekarang?" mungkin tak sampai lagi. Sabar naa.

Maybe few days before tu berpakat dengan rakan yang lain utk beli hadiah apa. Brainstorm possible hadiah yang sesuai. And of course, akan fikir nak pakai baju apa dua tiga hari sebelum wedding tu. You want to look good at your friend's wedding dont you? :p

But among all those points, there is something that will indirectly knocks you. Bak kata Sarah, Reality check-in. We will starts to think of our future more seriously in a bigger perspective, i think. Start to figure out where is your life leading you currently. Bukan nak kata macam its the end of the fun time. No, definitely!

Cuma macam bila kawan kau dah menjadi someone's husband/wife, that the beginning of a higher level of life for them. And so, random thoughts macam,

What does it takes to finally decided to have a married life at your current age?

Are you ready? Or are you not? Or are you even on your way to prepare yourself ?

Something like that lah :p

To get married at any age, depends on personal view and mentality. 

There will be no right or wrong, win or lose arguement in this case :)

To Yazmir and Faiqah, 

Congratulation! :D

 Enjoy the journey of finally having a lifetime partner, a soul-mate in your life. It was such an honor to be there on your big, special day. May Allah bless your marriage with happiness dunya and akhirah. Barakallahuma ♥

p.s: Waiting for your cute babies! :p

Langkawi trip.

Okay merujuk kepada previous post Sarah Hani,

Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah! I passed my EOS5. Yeayyyyyyyyyyyy! :D

It felt so awesome to read the Congratulation! words on the result slip.

And so do the rest six of us. It was a great feeling knowing we can actually had our long-planned vacation with no worries :) 

Langkawi je punnnnn :p

So basically aku akan tulis pasal The girls, me and what we basically did in Langkawi.

Ala ala tajuk post, Tips to Langkawi. Konon.

First day | Tuesday 4th December.

Reached Langkawi airport late in the evening. Maybe around 5pm something.
We rent an Avanza. RM150/day. Worry not for any last minute plan, sebab dekat airport tu itself memang banyak kereta sewa booth and all. Just the matter of mahal ke tak lah.

Check in to Landcons Hotel. Bagi aku Landcons ni okay sangat utk mereka yang takdelah mencari sangat kemewahan dalam accomodation,with a reasonable price, dengan erti kata lain tidur okay toilet okay - settle lah. and plus its a walking distance to Chenang beach :D

Had our first dinner at Haji Ramli since its one of the korang-kena-makan-kat-sini suggestion.
Personal review, sedap lah worth the money even though aku rasa dia mahal sikit compared than the standard price. Next, shopping for tomorrow island hoping and beach day! :D
Oh well, biasa lah perempuan. Dengan beach hat nya, pario nya. Alasan "Langkawi panas okay." relevant nya kenapa kena ada beach hat.

       

Day two | Wednesday 5th December.

Island Hoping day! :D RM25/person is one of standard price.
Basically akan cover boat trip to Pulau Dayang Bunting -> Pulau Singa Besar -> Pulau Beras basah.

Seperti mitos yang diperkatakan, kalau nak subur mandi lah kat sini. Tapi itu mitos lah kan. Common sense nya, you know what to do.  La la la.
Recomended kena pakai life jacket yang disewa. Pit-stop one hour.

Pulau Singa Besar actually pit-stop utk tengok eagle feeding. Takde lah apa-apa sangat sebab akan duduk dalam bot je and tengok eagle tu catch makanan yang dicampak abg bot. Sebab umur pun dah 20-an so takdelah macam nak Omg helang sangat kannnnnnnn.

Okay next, Pulau Beras Basah. Pit-stop ni hang pi mandi-mandi pantai. The sand was super soft, lembut bak pasir dalam hourglass tu. Okay ni baru macam excited sikit :p

Ni macam bujet snow lah kan. Bila fikir balik, takde motif jugak. haha.

Petang tu kteorg main banana boat dekat Pantai Chenang. RM10/person.

Jatuh dua kali. Kteorg begging kat abang tu, Nak jatuh kat tempat cetek PLEASEEEEEEEEEEE.

Okay fine, first jatuh tu. TAK CETEK pun. Aku as someone yang paranoid air and lemas, lagi lah bertambah paranoid. How could youuuuu.

Oleh sebab aku hilang keyakinan dekat tahap 'cetek' abang bot tu, aku je yang tak jatuh dari banana boat sebab hold on too tight. Lepas beberapa saat aku tgk belakang baru sedar semua orang dah jatuh. FAIL. Lepas tu kau bujet konon nak parasailing. 

Ohh Pleaseeeeeee -_-

Third day | Thursday 6th December

Chocolate shopping day! First pit-stop Kedai Haji Ismail, sebab based on short survey its one of the cheapest you can get around there. Despite mungkin murah sepuluh sen. Worth. Apa lah makna nya balik dari Langkawi kalau tak pulang berbekal kan Daim, kan?

Suggestion: Shopping lah chocolate time last day or nak dekat balik if hotel takde fridge, or end up some of them actually cair :(

Datarn Lang. 

Aktiviti : Camwhore di tengah panas berlumur kan sunblock. Tegar. 

Salam perantaaun 2013.

Terima kasih JPA.

Chenang beach

 Tiba-tiba a guy ni datang dekat kteorg,
" Hey i like your hats. Mine is small. Yours is big. Take a picture! " 

Sampai sekarang tak sure tu perli ke puji.

Friendship rings.
No, we are never too old for that :p

Fourth day | Friday 6th December.

Went for the cable car. Surprisingly, the fear of height had been overshadow by the fear of water.
Ke di-overshadow dengan panggilan tunang? malam semalam. Tettttttttttt.
Yang lain muka nervous je dalam tu. Alalalarh comel je.

Next, Gamat House and Pantai Pasir Hitam. Lepas tu BALIK! :(

Pegang tangan takut jatuh nanti :p

♥

So thats the end of the our Langkawi wrap-up.

Lepas ni sorang-sorang fly pergi tempat yang lain. Sobs.

Euro tour, next. Maybe? :D 

InsyaAllah. kalau ada rezeki, we will surely meet each other again. 

Untill then ....

Lots of love,

your Intan Nur Hadilah .

" Nothing makes the earth seems spacious as to have friends at a distance, they make the latitudes and longitudes."

Congratulations

You remember those days; last 5 yrs, in intec?

You remember the days in IMU?

I remembered them. The studies, assignments, exams that you went through.

You are a smart one. I know that.

You are going to continue the ireland dream. Me very happy for you.

Congrats intan nur hadilah. You did well. You deserve this.

-sarah hani