13 things happened in 2013

Not numbered in preference.

1. Performed my first delivery in Campbelltown hospital. 

2. Random dancing to beyonce songs moments with roomie

3. The "soul" talk at souled out,ampang

4. Truth about a housie reveals 

5. Left Georgiana crescent, enters harris park

6. Was denied being in a consultation room of a cancer pt; who was the yr3 staff coordinator

7. The so many ups and downs of 121

8. Went to london and paris

9. 4th sept was spent with candles and choc chip muffins

10. Adik, along and mummy visited campbelltown at different times of the year

11. Diagnosed with asthma in july2013 

12. "You dont need to like kids to pass paediatrics osce"

13. "I miss my person" moments

-sarah hani. 

#throwback

 intan nur hadilah

4th Decemeber 2013.

Happy 17th Birthday Qistina.

My sweet little sister, my first person I will recall when the word 'cousin' popped out.

We grew up basically near to each other.

I watched dearly your life transition.

To an annoying little girl who rebel much to this very heart warming lady.

It seems like every time I see you, I see me, in you :)

Writing this down, because changes is inevitable.

Your real life adventure will starts once you're out of school.

Enter college, meet new different kind of friends and stay away from home.

And, I pray to God that He will make you strong to face this new life.

Perhaps the next time I see you when I'm back, you'll be slightly different.

Its okay, thats normal. Its just that I hope different you is a better you.

Uhibukki fillah my little sister <3 nbsp="" p="">

Because changes are inevitable.

Just like the weather.

One day its autumn, the next day you remember its winter.

And so does people.

Again, and again.

:)

9.46am

7th December 2013

Up and Down.

intan nur hadilah


Had a phase of 'breakdown' fr these past days.
Right after the final exam timetable came out.
And guess what,

THEY SHIFTED IT A WEEK EARLIER. WHATTTTTTTTTTTTTT.

out of sudden.

Tak tahu kenapa aku geram sangat.
Maybe because I'm still not prepared to be in that final exam mode.
And of course I'm sad and frustrated that I had to cancel my flight to London to meet Sarah, Azri and Wari.
Just becuase the date is now coincide with the flight ticket.
Its one of the thing that I've been looking forward for the past months.
Our 'reunion' in London. Haihh.
Berkecai hati.

I REALLY need that break.
To meet some familiar faces and people to hang out with.
After adapting to this new life and environments. I just need that, you know.
Plus with the homesick feeling while you're sick.
Teringat how Mama would take care of me when I'm sick :(

So end up I felt like its just too much to digest within a day.
And I was emotionally unpredictable person. Sekejap okay, sekejap tiba-tiba rasa nak nangis.
Kesian AMMR kena face it. Sorryy. haha


Hang in there Intan.
Aren't you that bright, optimistic person? :)

RINDU NYA ♥

" Being strong is to love someone in silence,

to radiate happiness when we are unhappy,

to forgive someone who does not deserve forgiveness,

to stay calm in moment of despair,

to show jot when we do not feel it,

to smile when we want to cry,

to make someone happy when we our own heart is broken,

to be silent when we feel like screaming our anguish,

to comfort when we need to be comforted,

and to have faith when we longer no believe."

-Riccky Zulkifli

Reflect, message in the pretty bottle.

intan nur hadilah

I like it when I found something new I love to do.

It makes me feels like I get to know myself better. You know? 

Gituuuuu.

And so Im starting to love my forever alone weekend walk.

"Pergi dengan siapa kt situ?"

" Ohh sorang je."

" Ermm is everything okay? Kenapa sorang?"

" Haha. okay je lah. Saja suka."

A time alone to yourself is something that I think everyone should have.

To discover uhh-meh-zing walking-distance places around Galway.

EHH AKU SUKA GILAA LAH. Serius. haha.

Freedom.

To embrace the beauty,

To observe people around you,

To discover new things.

To reflect.

Deep with thoughts and emotions.

Gratitude and love.

I fell in love more and more with Galway.

Alhamdulillah.

Sunday 20th October. | Spanish Arch |

all picture form Iphone 4 JEEEE :p

Its was so amazingly beautiful, every single of it.
And seriously lagi sikit nak menangis time discover the rainbow :')

Analogi nya--

Andai kata kau pergi Art Gallery. Kau pusing, kau hayati semua art kat situ.
Apa yang kau fikir setiap kali kau kagum dengan satu art. Mesti kau akan fikir something like,
" Siapa yang lukis ni? Kagum gila. Smart kot. Apa yang dia nak cuba sampaikan sebenarnya?"

Atau seantara dengan nya lah. Kan?

" Indeed, in the creation of the heaven and the earth and the alternation of the night and the day are sign those of understanding." -Quran

" We must study the message behind all His beauty. Because if we do not, we are like the one who finds a message inside a beautifully decorated bottle, yet become so enamoured by the bottle, that you never open the message."

Semua yang kita lihat ni hanya lah reflection.
"Reflection to His Greatness, His majesty, His beauty.
A pointer to His might and His power."

Logik kan?
:)

Biar deep sikit, bukan semata nak post Instagram je. hahaha.

ANYWAY
First exam next Tuesday.
Tapi entah kenapa aku rajin sangat lah nak post.
Pre-exam syndrome, memang macam ni. Menyampah i.
Wish me all the best. Doa doa kan ♥

Sabr.

intan nur hadilah


Sesungguh nya manusia itu banyak ragam nya.
Kadang- kadang ada yang kita suka, ada yang kita tak suka. 
Ada yang kita rasa pelik, ada yang kita tak faham lansung pun ada.
Worry not, memahami semua manusia bukan lah kerja kita pun pada asal nya.
Anggap je lah 'All emotions are unique.'


Akan ada satu fasa dalam hidup, di mana kadang-kadang kita tak boleh pilih dengan siapa kita nak bersama.
Setiap hari, setiap masa, untuk setiap yang terjadi dalam kehidupan seharian.
You see that's the challenge in life, and that's also the beauty of it.
Oh well, its depends on how you want to see and define it.


Kau belajar banyak benda baru.
Kind hearted people teach you kindness.
Loud and cheerful people teach you happy vibes.
Hard working people teach you motivation.
Annoying people teach you patience.

dan seantara dengan nya. 


People change, almost most of the times. Better or worse, depends?
Sometimes it is part of the adaptation. Sometimes because they wanted to. Sometimes because of the ignorance. Or sometimes.....I dont know.

And I know there's some part of me had changed recently. 
Aku tak biasa 'melawan'. Kalau aku marah aku senyap. Aku biar.
You know those moments where sometimes your anger turn into tears?
Mereka yang rapat tau, kalau aku marah aku memang tak boleh pandang that person in the eyes sampai hati aku reda. 
Lepas tu kalau perlu cakap, cakap.

Aku boleh berbalas kata
kalau itu yang buat hati aku puas.

Tapi aku pilih utk diam,
sebab aku tahu kepuasan itu hanya sementara.

Jadi buat apa nak sia-sia?

Some things are better left unsaid.
Don’t they?

Yang pegang hati kau bukan manusia tapi Tuhan.

" If people display bad character towards us, it should not make us drop our good character as a result." - Mufti Ismael Menk

Come on Intan Nur Hadilah, you know better. *monolog*
xxx

Hello there Galway.

intan nur hadilah

Its been 1 months plus since I'm away from dear home and Mama.
" Galway? So far so good."
The same answer to the common question asked, " Hows Galway?"
And I really meant it.

Its quiet a total diff place form home.
The environment, the weather, the food and the people.
Oh well obviously Malaysia will always win in term of food :D

Most of the people here are very friendly with good manners.
Perhaps because it a small city compared to other place like Dublin.
Banyak lagi benda nak cerita tapi aku tak tahu macam mana nak cerita.
Or mcm malas sebab dah lama sangat postpone post ni :(


If nak update bout interesting place to go when you visit Galway, perhaps its another post.
KALAU RAJIN LAH :(

Alhamdulillah.
It took nearly a month to feel really homesick.
Can you believe it? Me a girl who never been away far far from home.
Pencapaian. haha :D

Tipu lah kalau tak homesick. Especially on a gloomy weather day.
Serius kalau dah homesick, hari hari aku akan homesick.
But come on.. KEEP CALM AND BE STRONG :p

So here's a picture of here and there in Galway.

Hari Raya celebration

the Quadrangle

Cliff of Moher

Galway Shop Street

saturday evening at Salthill

And its Autmn! :)

from my window

Perhaps, next time with words. For now let the pictures describe the thousand 'blocked words'.

Countdown till next summer break starts now!

xxx

Pretty please ?

If dapat balik msia hujung thun ni ---

aku akan menjadi --- 

sangat gembira. Sangat. 

PleAse Allah, bagi aku balik cuti? Tolong aku get through last rotation ni. :) 

Rindu.

o
intan nur hadilah

Akan ada satu perasaan bila-bila aku baca kawan-kawan atau random strangers
bercakap pasal ayah masing-masing.
Either I read it on blogpost, facebook, Instagram or verbally.
I am not sure of what feeling was i talking about,
But for sure its not sad, jealous or anything negative.

Mngkin aku tumpang gembira. "Alhamdulillah seronok nyaa.."
Atau mungkin jugak aku selalu fikir,
" What is it feels to still have a dad now?"

Fitrah manusia, bila dah tiada baru terhengeh-terhengeh untuk menghargai.
I havent done much with my dad untill the age of 22.
But there will always be fantasy of mine,

That I'll take picture of us during my graduation day,
with his proud face on.
That he hug me and silently cry on my wedding day.
That he will be playing around with my (future) children, his grandchildren.

And many more...

" Sometimes you search so hard for the words. You find a way to interpret the language of this heart and the unspoken feelings. But in the end you are left with nothing but silence. And deep down you hope it's understood."

Pandang ke depan.
Jangan salah sangka. Aku tak pernah salah kan takdir or dwell on it.
Alhamdulillah for everything. Tapi tak salah kan berangan kadang-kadang? :)

Mama.
I love you, hanya Tuhan tahu bagaimana. ♥


I wanted to post something about Galway. Seriously its been days kot.
Maybe during the weekend.

an evening rainbow on our walk home in Galway.

You cant have a rainbow without a little rain.

Galway,Ireland.Intan Nur Hadilah datang.

16.08.2013 is the date to be saved, date to be remembered by at least me and intan =)

it is going to be a big day for Intan -  flying abroad to further her studies is considered a big event. umur 22 tahun, ini la yang "big event" in life :D Intan will be a NUIG-ian.lol.

to inform all u readers, flying to Ireland, to do medicine - was my dream masa form 5. intan didnt have any preference to which country to further her studies. but now, dengan izin Allah - the best planner - she is living my dream. Ireland kowtt.haha. eventhough i secretly wish she gets to Australia (UWs to be specific) after her IMU studies.. but that's alright... ireland is where you deserve to be,babe.

the not so nice part is; end of this year (2013), intan wont be in melawati waiting for me to come home :( serious x best.... my person yang teman karok, mamak, cendol, bowling, jalan KL, makan.makan.makan. i know it is not fair to feel that way... she has been waiting for me to come home every year for 3 years... now,it is my time, to wait for her...but our holidays are in totally opposite seasons. her winter is my summer and vice versa. so, intan.sila kumpul duit- mai syd jjune/july2014 tauu. and i'll see what i can do to be at your place when aku lak summer :D panjang umur, murah rezeki aku mai naa.. hihi.

kalau aku gi, aku nak tgkp gmbr kat sini! (rujuk gambar di bawah)

*google image-school of medicine NUIG*

all the best,intan nur hadilah. Leap with faith, graduate as a doctor. and jangan lupa balik malaysia with an Irish accent.! :P take care in Ireland, jangan lupa update aku time to time, and i will be watching you from afar - virtually. kalau kau perlukan apa2,you know where to find me.hopefully, our lives are destined to coincide again-sometime in the future as doctors.insyaAllah =)


Much love, your friend. Sarah Hani.

A girl with the green apron.

Intan Nur Hadilah.

Oh well, i miss writing. IT' BEEN A WHILE.

Its been a long phase of a life-break before flying off to Galway. And so, I had a part time job

As a sales associate at Vitacare.

Honestly, I am so blessed to have been working here.

Banyak sangat benda yang aku belajar.

Be it medically or non-medical. Most importantly it is about learning more about LIFE.

Met new different type of people. Diff origin, diff background stories, diff attitude.

6 bulan aku kerja kat sini. Tak tahu nak mula dari mana apa yang aku belajar.

In term of medical, mungkin dah lebih familiar with drugs right now. 

Kot lah kan. Ke bujet familiar. 

You know, sometimes being a medical student, deep inside you cant help to feel sort of a superior feeling over other 'ordinary' people. 

So bila kau tengah mop lantai awal pagi, ada customer masuk jalan dengan selamba nya,

Bila kau kena sound dengan customer sebab kenapa hari sabtu takde plastic bag,

Bila customer complain kenapa barang mahal sangat,

Bila ada customer tak pasal nak rude tiba-tiba,

-- You think they care if you are a future doctor? Nahhh. 

So I learnt one valuable lesson, basically kita semua sama.

Meeting and knowing new people is also one of the best things.

Getting the regular customers to know you.

Having to be working in an environment where people you familiar with are so much older than you,

is one of the thing you don't get in college. 

The feelings of entering a mall and feels like you are part of the big family. 

To learnt the hard ways of earning your own money. Every penny of it.

Bukan lah berasal dari family yang berada. 

To not ask money from my mum to buy things that I want is a self-achievement.

Alhamdulillah. Cuba lah kerja, anda akan tahu.

 Dear Kak Azi.

Intan tahu Kak Azi tak kan baca pun ni. haha. But just gonna write it anyway.

You are one of a kind person that I ever met in my life. One of the lovable by everyone.

Thank you for being my big sister for the last six months. 

Ajar Intan buat kerja dari seorang yang noob gila sampai pro lah jugak kan.haha.

Tanpa Kak Azi, tak ceria lah Vitacare tu :)

Hi Yaya. Kak Intan rinduuuuuuuu okay. Belajar rajin-rajin. Jaga Ummi and ayah tau.

Dear Fatin,

My bitching mate.

Terima kasih sebab kita share body languange, eye contact yang sama bila ada abang handsome masuk pharmacy. haha :D

You are cool that way.

Dear Siti,

My angelic darling.

Kte baru kenal awak tak sampai sebulan, but it feels like we are so connected in so many ways.

Be an awesome physiotherapist okay? Lets pray we can work in a same hospital :D

Dear Fay.

I hope you will find that one thing that you love one day, be it whatever job it is.

And thank you for being an awesome manager that understand my craziness. haha.

Like we can still whatsapp and talks about that handsome MO and DKSH guy.

And please, get married and soon and have babies okay? 

Its been an awesome phase of my life

A phase where i can wish to turn back time and be in it for just another day.

Missing it already.

Goodbye green apron. You have served me well :)

During a boring lecture

Anyone who reads this blog? No one.? Yea. I thot so.

I am bored. This 1.5hours lecture is so boring. Why does the SoM keeps on calling d same type of people to talk about the almost same type of topic?!

Okay. I got a discussion session now bye.

Pimple curse.

intan nur hadilah.

At the age of (going to be) 22, people surrounds me know it well of how pimple and me are very close related.
Of how those P-thingy would affect my life every 'period of the month'.

I would have one, and by this, its not the normal-what-is-there-to-fuss-about pimple.
BUT,

its the i-can-spot-it-from-miles-away pimple with addition of i-shall-haunt-you-for-the-post acne scar for month or even worst God knows how long.

Its hormonal, and i am so immune with it.
Eventhough i get a lil 'depress' at times.
Tak tipu. ha-ha.

Kak Fay, the pharmacist where i work now
-- That's good. Its means you still young.

Ye lah tu.

And Azri come out with this,

" Jangan tegur pimple orang, nanti dapat kat kita."

So one day, after my day-off of the week, coming back to work. Instead of saying,
" Hi we miss you!" --

Kak Fay looked me in the face and said,

" Hey you got a new pimple."

And i was like, " Oh god, NO YOU DID NOT SAID THAT!"
Sambil cepat cepat amik cermin and fikir weh obvious sgt ke, walaupun fakta nya dah lama pun tahu.

The next day,

She came to work with a quiet a huge pimple on her nose. And complaint of how self-concious she is at the moment.

-

Hahahaha.
tu lah orang dah kata. Its a curse.
Its my 'curse' :p

For now...

Super Memes.

If intan is talking about her life. Here n there.
I am stuck with my preparation for upcoming osce.

MH012013. That represents the four malaysian troopers who are going to battle it out next friday.

Just another letter.

intan nur hadilah

There’s an amazing thing about broken hearts. 
When you don’t get what you want, you discover a need.
When you discover a need, you begin to ask.
When a request is unfulfilled, you keep asking.

Sometimes He doesn’t give you what you ask for when He wants to give you something more.
Sometimes He doesn’t give you right away because He knows there’s something better. Or so you can keep asking. Because it is in the process of begging, the process of crying to Allah, that you are elevated and brought nearer.

It is in the process of asking that you are brought to the foot of His throne.
It is your need and helplessness that drove you to His throne. He deprives to give.

-  Yasmin Mogahed

Helplessness.

Mungkin mereka tak tahu atau tak perlu tahu.
Kadang-kadang aku penat. Letih. Bosan.
Kenapa perlu wujud masalah semua ni? Sampai bila nak selesai?
Tersepit di tengah-tengah.
Di sini berkata begini, di sana berkata begitu.
Ditelan mata mak, diluah mati bapak.
Takpe, masuk telinga kanan keluar telinga kiri.

"Bersangka baik, bersangka baik, bersangka baik." 
Benda yang aku selalu ingat kan hati -- setakat yang mampu.

Maintain.
Sebab aku selalu tahu, aku belajar banyak benda.
Nilai hidup yang Tuhan bagi sebagai ganti.
Yang cikgu atau lecturer kat sekolah tak boleh ajar.

Alhamdulillah even for the bad. As hard as it is to believe, it can be so much worse.

the third one.
" Because it is in the process of begging, the process of crying to Allah, that you are elevated and brought nearer."

Jangan berhenti berharap.
Tapi apa-apa pun,yang aku tahu dapat gaji bulan ni, 31st March aku NAK Baskin Robbin.
Okay tidur.

Imaginary family tree.

Hi. Nama penuh - Intan Nur Hadilah binti Purdiono.

Dulu masa sekolah sampai sekarang, mesti orang akan bertanya,

" Ayah awak Indonesian ke?"

Yes, he was. And so my mother.

They had migrated to Malaysia around 30 years ago. 

Way before they had me, and so my first brother.

I'm a traveler's daughter. Two married person migrated to another country that was a complete strange to them and decided to have a life here. Solo, no relatives neither other family members.

I grew up,

not knowing how does it feels to 'balik kampung' during holiday or Hari Raya.

not knowing how does it feels to call someone, 'Mak Long' or ' Pak Ngah'.

not knowing how does it feels to have a nenek that will cook whatever you are craving to eat.

But among the 'not knowing', I am so blessed with a brother, a sister, a mother and a dad ( I miss you ) indeed. Truly.

Life is beautiful in many ways depends on how you choose to see it.

And through out my life, there are countless wonderful people come into my life and be my partial family relatives. My partials aunts and uncles, and even cousins.

My mum had babysits these two girls since there were 2 months. 

They were one of my precious childhood memories.

Playing mak-mak, cikgu-cikgu, masak-masak and maybe yes, we did play kahwin-kahwin :p

Being the oldest, i remembered being the mak and these kids would be my lovely children.

Weh okay serius lawak bila fikir balik. Biasa lah zaman takde Angry Bird, Temple Run kan.

And at the age of 17 and 15, Tina and Adik still come over for sleep over.

They remind me pretty much of my sister and me.

Talking about each other friend's and we are each other fashion consultant.

" Adik, Nana nampak BOYAN tak pakai selipar ni?" haha. 

Time flies. These little girls are growing up and be a grown up ladies. 

Kalau dulu ajak main gi padang, sekarang ajak lepak Tutti Frutti lah kannnn. 

Kalau dulu ajar colour colour, sekarang ajar nak kira mass of Oxygen- Chemistry.

Padahal aku pun tak ingat mcm mana.

I thank Him for lending you people in my life. I love you sweethearts dearly. ♥

Be a person your parents would be proud of here and Life after, InsyaAllah.

Ohh and one more thing,

Nanti Kak Intan kahwin tolong jadi flower girl eh? 

Psych rotation #1

Personality disorders;
1. Cluster A-odd and eccentric
- paranoid
- schizoid
- schizotypal
2. Cluster B- dramatic, emotional and erratic
- antisocial
- histrionic
- borderline
- narcisstic
3. Cluster C -anxious and fearful
- OCD
- avoidant
- dependant

Tahu klasifikasi itu dahulu.
Cukup.

L i f e 🌟

intan nur hadilah

“Setiap orang,
Akan ada sesuatu yang dia simpan.
Akan ada sesetengah perkara yang dia sembunyikan.

Dan ada sesetengah perkara yang ingin dia kongsikan.

Siapa pun dia,
Segembira mana pun dia.
Walau sekerap mana kamu melihat dia tersenyum,
Pasti ada perkara-perkara yang pernah membuat dia terluka.


Pasti ada sesuatu yang pernah menguris hatinya,
Pasti ada sesuatu yang pernah membuat dia menangis.

Pasti ada.
Kerana dia juga manusia.

Makanya,
Bila kamu menyangka bahawa hanya kamu yang merasa,

Hanya kamu yang melalui,

Dan hanya kamu yang mengerti,

Kamu silap, dan kamu salah.

Ada orang lain yang pernah melaluinya,
Bahkan ada orang lain yang pernah merasakan lebih dari apa yang kamu rasakan.

Ada orang lain yang pernah melalui lebih teruk dari apa yang pernah kamu lalui.
Ada.

Cuma, mungkin kamu yang tak pernah tahu,
Kamu yang tak pernah nampak.
Jangan selalu menganggap,

Bahawa kamulah yang paling susah, 
paling sakit diuji,

Paling berat diduga.

Ada.

Ada insan lain, yang lebih besar ujiannya, yang lebih berat penderitaannya.
Sudahlah, kesat air matamu,


Walau serumit mana situasi kamu.
 Pujuk hatimu.
Yakinlah DIA ada, dan akan selalu ada.
Bila kamu menyandar harapan padaNYA, DIA tak akan sekali-sekali mempersia harapan kamu.


Bila kamu mempercayai segala takdir dan ketentuanNYA,
DIA tak akan sekali-sekali mengkhinati kepercayaan kamu.”

via tersenyum-melihat-langit. tumblr

2012, you had been a year filled with every emotions, every colours that exist in this universe.
And no matter what, I am very thankful for every single of it because i believe each up and down comes with wonderful blessing, indeed :)

Alhamdulillah.
2013, please be awesome too!
pleaseeee pleaseeee pweaseeee.
:)